Common sense, that was the topic of an amusing squabble between visiting family members over the holidays.

The other morning I woke up thinking about the popular holiday song “The Twelve Days of Christmas.”

Give thanks. De’ las gracias. Geben Sie Dank. Dia i ringraziamenti.

So, my husband and I are on a plane to Memphis when I turn to him and say, “Hey. We’re not doing anything except hanging out here at 34,000 feet, what do you say we write a funny column?”

I have nothing against air. In fact, I love it. It’s literally something I can’t live without. But even air has its place, like, well…in the air, in tires and tennis shoes, balloons and beach balls, air guitars and airmail.

I love lettuce.