Published: Wednesday, Aug. 12, 2009 / Updated: Wednesday, Aug. 12, 2009 11:51 AM
Beth can really pack it in
To me, a normal refrigerator has more shelf space than food.
My friend Beth's refrigerator has more food than shelf space. Actually, it has all food and no shelf space. For all I know, it might not even have shelves but just have food stacked higher and higher and wider and wider.
I know it takes a tremendous amount of food to nurture Princess Madelyn's creativity, to keep Wild-Man Jack happy and to fuel Scott's lightning fast, witty one-liners, not to mention Beth, who needs energy to uphold order.
And yes, I love the fabulous food and good times that come out of that refrigerator. But, please, don't send me in alone. I've seen things in there teetering on one another, leaning against each other and innocent pickle jars forced out to the edge of doom.
I am afraid of my friend's refrigerator.
One day, I made the mistake of hanging out near it when Beth asked, “Karen, would you put that juice in the refrigerator?”
Would I? Yes. But could I? That was another question. I'd seen the insides of this refrigerator. A GPS couldn't find a destination for an olive let alone a juice container. I opened the door cautiously. Food was stuffed, packed, crammed and jammed in a number of inventive ways. If I moved one thing, I would be the sole cause of an avalanche. I stood paralyzed, juice in hand, staring at what could be the Guinness world record for “Most Food Stuffed in a Refrigerator.”
Suddenly, I felt all the cold air escaping and because it was blowing on me, I was forced to take action. That's when I surrendered the container to my friend, along with a helpless, “Where would you put this juice?”
Without hesitation, she took the juice, shuffled things over, under and around each other and before I knew it…voila! The juice was in the refrigerator. And she never dropped, cracked or spilled one thing.
It takes a certain skill to conquer a stuffed refrigerator. My friend has it. I don't. Maybe it comes with experience or maybe it comes with kids. I have neither.
But maybe she'll teach me. I'm planning a trip. If she can pack a suitcase like she packs a refrigerator, I can take more clothes than I'll need. With her skills, I could take my entire wardrobe.
Karen Tomas is a resident of Fort Mill. E-mail her at brainflurries@aol.com.
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